What I Am (oddly) Thankful For

1. I am thankful for all of the horrible people that I’ve had in my life over the years; without them I would not be the strong, wise person that I am today. You’re not in my life now to read this, but that’s the way love goes (thank you Janet Jackson), and I’m now better for it.

No, this video's not related to the subject,

but I have this song stuck in my head now and had to share it.

2. I am thankful for the man/woman who marketed the Snuggie™. Anyone who can make a blanket with sleeves a household name is a genius in my book. While I haven’t personally succumbed to his marketing, I’m glad there are brains like his/hers’ in the world. When I finish my book, I want them on my marketing team.

I really like the leopard print one (hint-hint, Christmas gift!)

 3. Speaking of books (weren’t we?), I’m thankful for any and all authors who take the time to write books that take me out of the real world, if even for a brief moment. If I could meet Stephen King in person I would kiss him on the lips in thanks. He is the master story teller, and has taken me on mental rides that I actually cherish. Stephenie Meyer is another one. Yes, I’m one of those Twilight people. But to be taken back to a time when love was fresh so vibrantly, and so completely, was very well done. As a matter of fact, I read the whole entire Twilight series last Thanksgiving weekend. I’ll never forget it. This is what great authors do for me – not only do they take me away, they impart something in my life – indelible memories. More people should read…

I really was just looking for a reason to add Twilight to my blog...

4. I’m thankful for losing my job this past April. It gave me an unprecedented chance to spend a LOT of quality time with my son, and to reflect on what I want to be when I grow up. Oddly enough, I want to be what I was – but I want to do it for myself now. It just took the economy saying “no” to me enough times when looking to get hired to inspire me to start my own business. Will it be easy? Hell no. But it will be done on MY terms, and MY way. No more office politics or corporate B.S. Freedom!

5. I am thankful for Facebook, and the internet in general. Without it I wouldn’t have met a lot of you, or be in touch with friends as often as I currently am. I’m absolutely horrible when it comes to true social interaction, so being able to do it virtually is a godsend. So thank you Al Gore for inventing the internet! And thanks to you too – jerk they made a movie about – that created Facebook!

Thanks Al!

6. Speaking of wasting time on the internet (weren’t we?), I’m thankful for LOLCats and Ellen DeGeneres. Between reading crazy misspelled captions of photos of cute and cuddly animals, and crazy videos, I have my day filled up quite regularly. I won’t even start on YouTube…

thtz mye mottoe

7. Speaking of TV (blah blah blah), I’d like to thank the inventor of the DVR for allowing me to be completely lazy in my TV viewing habits, and to never have to watch another Viagra® or Cialis® commercial during my favorite shows again! There’s actually some debate over who invented the technology, but I’ll go with these guys. Whoever really did it, kudos!

8. Speaking of inventors (*cough*), thank you to whoever invented instant coffee. I’m not going to bother looking it up, because it will only dispel my delusion that it’s made magically by beautiful faeries and pixies under some far off rainbow. Right next to where they tend the enchanted cows that produce delicious Hazelnut Coffeemate. These two things are my life blood. Without them I would be lost.

No they didn't hire me, but I still love their product. Damn them!

9. I’m thankful for the people that work on holidays. Sure, they’re probably only doing it for the extra money they get for “holiday pay,” and not the kindness of their hearts, but I would hate to have to work on a holiday. Don’t think I ever have, really. It’s been a while since I did retail, and times sure have changed since then. Now places are open almost every day, no matter what. Some of these workers probably got the shaft since they’re new and don’t have seniority. Whatever the reason – if you’re out and about on a holiday – thank the people that are working that day. Your last minute forgetfulness of the gravy or cranberry sauce is the reason they are there and not at home with their own families.

10. And finally, on a serious note (although I was totally serious about the other 9), of course I am thankful for all of my wonderful friends and family. Without whom, I would be a total schmuck living in a cave somewhere. You all support me, encourage me, and pull me out of the shell I tend to retreat into. You make my soul smile, and my heart laugh on a regular basis. I can only aspire to be as good of a friend in return. You bring out the best in me, and for that, I am eternally grateful.



All together now - Awww.


What are you thankful for?

The Nifty New Gadget

I'm writing this post with help from a new gadget that I'm trying out before I buy.  It's called Dragon NaturallySpeaking software, and it types whatever I speak into the microphone attached to the headset now sitting on my head, or half of it anyway.  Only one ear is covered, and I feel like I should be taking orders at McDonald's in the drive through, or answering your customer service questions. Either way, it's taking some getting used to, that's for sure.

As you might have read in my previous post, I repel technology, so God only knows how this is going to work.  I'm liking it so far, but there is a huge learning curve both on the software's part and on mine.  It needs to learn how I speak (which is not very well), and I need to learn how to command it to do what I want it to do.  I'm hoping as I train it to understand me better, and as I learn how to maneuver around it we can find some common ground.  I will say, it is a very good speller, and even if it gets a word wrong it's at least spelled correctly.  I'm finding that most of the issues that I have with it are in punctuation, which is always a problem for me anyway.  I'm always putting in commas, where they don't, belong, so maybe this will help with that problem.

On top of all of my technology problems, I'm also not much of a speaker.  I'm very quiet and reserved and don't speak unless I have to to be honest, so this thinking out loud thing is really new to me.  Not that I don't occasionally talk to myself out loud, who doesn't?  But to do it consistently where you're supposed to be writing is really strange. Also, I tend to use a lot of slang which the software doesn't understand.  So I'm going to sound a lot more formal than I really am.  It seems to be picking it up pretty quickly though, so maybe the future isn't so bleak.

The reason for this new endeavor?  Yet another way for me to try to get myself writing.  I'm hoping that maybe if I can think out loud with a stream-of-consciousness kind of thing with my writing, maybe I'll do it more.  We'll see.  I really need to get over the thinking out loud hurdle first. I tried it a little earlier in both Ghosting and Indigo, and actually got some work done.  New chapters have been started in both.  So that's an accomplishment.  I really hope I can get over the awkwardness of the whole thing, because it is really kinda neat.

What technology do you use to get yourself writing? Have you ever tried this kind of thing before?  Do you file things away in your head?  Or do you jot things down in a notebook? I'm curious if there are any other writers out there that use this type of software for their writing. It seems like it would be pretty useful except for dialogue.  Having to dictate the punctuation separately is kind of a hindrance, but for just getting the story down, and the words on paper this seems ideal.  I may just have to dictate all of my blogs from now on.  Ha ha.

Steps

My blogs in the short duration will most likely be about my new business venture rather than my writing, but it is what’s happening in my life. Plus, this is still “technically” writing…

My friend Sheba recently wrote a post entitled “Two Steps Forward, One Step Back,” and boy can I relate to that one today. It started with the bank – I went to open the business account since I received my EIN (tax ID) number, and have prepared the LLC docs, only to find out the LLC paperwork needs to be filed with the State first. Kind of backwards, since I’ll be paying for the filing with my own personal funds, but makes sense too that they won’t open the account in that type of name until its “official.” I just wish they would have told me that when I was there last week and asked about it… So, Josh and I just continued on our way and grocery shopped for enough food to feed a pack of wild rabid dogs for about a month, and life was good again. For a minute.

Maybe I should have played this game as a child instead of pretending I was one of Charlies' Angels.

Next I moved the Monster Desk back into the office space only to discover that my wireless network adapter doesn’t work with 64-bit Windows 7 on my desktop computer. I’ll need that computer to run on the wireless network until I can get the business lines installed (yeah, still haven’t called them either). SO, off to Radio Shack I will go tomorrow to purchase a new adapter. If you’re the kind of person that likes clicking on links, here’s the link to the adapter I’ll be picking up. The fun just never stops around here.



I'm all about pictures-in-the-blog today.

 So fine, at least everything is in the office now, right? But wait – there’s more! Somehow in the process of moving, oh the 50 feet or so from the living room to the office, my printer committed suicide without me noticing. It didn’t even say goodbye or print a note. I just put new ink in it a few weeks ago too, and this is how it thanks me… the nerve! Add that to the list = printer. Check. (click here Clickers) This time I’m investing in a laser. Inkjets are for sissys! Pfft!

Now it’s 3 am and I just finished my first attempt at a logo, and I can’t say I’m exactly happy with it, but it’s a start. The perfectionist in me (read-OCD) will be messing with it until it’s just right…

meh.

So, two steps forward, one step back? Or three or four? I’ve lost count, but I think that might be a good thing in this case.

Yes it is. :)

Drum Roll Please...

It’s Monday night, and I just spent the better part of an hour clearing space in my third bedroom, heretofore known as the “junk room” or on good days; the “sewing room,” to make room for my (drum roll please) “Office.” Sure, it’s only a work table and comfy folding chair, and I’m on my laptop instead of my desktop, but it works. The door is shut, so I can’t hear the Ghostbusters or Darth Vadar activities on the TV in the living room. My iHome is set up, and I’m listening to one of my favorite Dario Marionelli scores. I have my cup of coffee, and I’m good to go.

For those that read my blog with any regularity, you know that I’ve been unemployed since April, and was at war between my writing desire, and my professional legal career. Fear not, dear hearts, for I have come to a solution. One that more than a few of you have recommended after hearing of my plight.

(Insert another drum roll here. Hey - I was a drummer, we never get solos).

I’m going to start my own virtual paralegal service.

There. I said it. It’s out there for the world to see. Whew! That wasn’t so hard.

Ah, but alas, I know it will be hard. I’m no stranger to running a business: I was a partner in a cleaning business that did really well, and could have even expanded if we wanted it to, but it was extremely physically demanding, and the legal world and school was calling me at the time. Prior to that, I had a secretarial service that only did moderately well. I got what I put into that one, which I admit, wasn’t enough. That was the mid ‘90s though, and the internet was still fairly new, and a pretty slow way to work. Technology has advanced so much since then that I think, if I do it correctly, I can make a pretty good go of it.

I still have a lot of background work and research to do before I hang the shingle, but I am now motivated. One of the terrible things about depression after a job loss, is the inability to concentrate. I already feel invigorated with new purpose, and can feel my ‘spidey senses’ coming around again.

I’m hoping to capitalize on this horrible economy by being a budgetary option to law firm’s whose clients don’t want to pay outrageous fees. Or even to solo practitioners and companies who don’t want the extra payroll. This could be a boon time for us little legal entrepreneurs, if done right.

I’m also going to INCORPORATE my writing skills into what I offer. No longer will I allow it to be a negative smear on my record. My writing is an ASSET to any professional endeavor I undertake, it always has been, and it always will be. Those that disagree will just have to miss out on my fabulous creativity, and ability to “think outside the box.” (do we even say that anymore?)

So now it’s time for me to get busy getting this off the ground. Time to think of a company name, register everything, research the heck out of everything, promote and market the hell out of it, and prepare for the torrent of business that will soon head my way. Ha ha.

Daunted? Hell yes. Determined? Even more so.

Shock and Awe

I received so many words of encouragement after Hope Clark posted my letter to her in her newsletter, I'm in shock at the outpouring of kind words, and in awe of the support for my writing.  I've heard from people from all over the world, and really, am just stunned by the support.  It was unexpected, and most appreciated.

Not only did I receive a tremendous amount of support, I got a ton of great ideas to boot. From blogging more often - which I totally intend to do, to going solo and consulting with my legal career. I have so much food for thought, I'm overfed! The dichotomy of my writing and  professional life, I'm learning, doesn't necessarily have to be so far apart. They can be one, if I do it right. Which I wholeheartedly intend to look into. For sure.

To those that wrote to me - thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for sharing your stories, and giving me even more reasons to go on with my writing.  I know now, that I am not alone in my struggle, and can empathize with those that have gone through a similar circumstance with the whole job/web thing. It's really unfortunate that we creative types even have to consider our "web presence"  as we live our daily lives and try to get by.

I can only hope that my story has encouraged other writers to keep the faith, and keep going with their writing.  If you're a writer, it is who you are - it's what you do, nothing can stop it.

And on that note, I'll sign off, with the knowledge that the writers have united, and had the last word. (As always!)

Take care,
-Amy

Of Course!

I actually have the itch to write, and my laptop is at the Gateway Repair Center being revived from the land of the dead. Since buying it in June, I've had nothing but trouble with it, but in my mind - that's my writing station. I can't get the same "feel" while writing on my desktop computer.

It's all mental - I get that. It's like a weird baseball-player superstition of wearing the same underwear during a playoff, but it is what it is. I hate that I feel this way. Like, if I was a Real writer, I would be able to write anywhere, anytime. Is that true? Or do all writers have their "favorite" places and ways to write?

Maybe if the desktop weren't in the middle of the living room, where I have to contend with 'Ghostbusters' on the TV all day, I could do it. Even headphones couldn't drown out Bill Murray and the Stay Puft Marshmallow man, I'm afraid. (Thanks Josh!)

I really want to get to my edits too. My good friend Jan (I need a nickname for you, since I'm your 'Goddess' lol) has some really great edits for me.

(Thanks again for taking the time to edit Jan!)

I've put off this massive edit long enough. I need to get those first 50 into Page To Fame. I have the desire to do it now, but a huge mental block with no laptop. Or is it an excuse? (here I go a-rambling...) I seem to have excuse after excuse as to why I'm not writing. There's always something that keeps me from it. What am I afraid of? Failure? or success? or both?

In my heart I know I should just buckle down and do it. Part of me is just discouraged by everything and anything, so why even try. Another part of me has hope that someday, just maybe, it will be good enough to someone of importance to do something life changing - like sell. But most of me is just scared. Scared that it sucks. Scared that it will be just another one of my failed attempts at something creative. Scared that I will reinforce the knowledge that I'm no good at anything. If I don't try, I can't fail.

But...

If I don't try, I can't succeed either...

I think I need to follow my Jedi training here -

"Do or do not... there is no try."

The Writer Question, Revisited

I'm struggling with a massive cold/flu bug right now, so this might be muddled, but I need to get this out of my system. I even recently wrote to Hope Clark of Funds For Writers for her insight and opinion on the subject. She may be featuring this situation in her next newsletter, so if you're visiting from there - welcome!

Here's the skinny:

By day, I'm an educated paralegal (meaning, I have a degree and everything!). Well, I should qualify that - I've been unemployed since early April. I'm an Intellectual Property Paralegal (patents, trademarks, etc.), and let me tell you, the jobs in this field are few and far between. I've had some great interviews, but nothing has come to fruition. Here's the rub - I recently had a potential employer, I assume - Google my name, and find my personal website promoting my writing. Upon seeing my website, they decided that my "focus" was not on my legal career, but on my writing career.

While I completely understand their position, if they had truly read at any of the pages they would have seen that I've only published a few short stories (and self-published at that), and haven't even finished writing my first novel!  As I told Hope, unless you see my face plastered on a bestseller in a major bookstore, I still need a J.O.B. to survive! AND - I'm a darned good paralegal too! I loved my job, and I love learning all aspects of the legal world. If anything, my interest in writing makes me a better paralegal!

I like to think that I dodged a major bullet with that particular employer. I don't think I want to work with a firm that doesn't allow for outside creativity, or even hobbies for that matter. It's not like I'm selling porn, or even writing in the erotica genre (no offense to those that do btw). I don't even use swear words in my books. Well, not many...

This situation makes my job search even more discouraging, because now I have to worry that my "web presence" will overshadow my need for a regular income, and a regular job. I'm a single mother, and I have a son with special needs. Once the unemployment runs out, which it tends to do, we'll be in even more financial trouble than we already are. That's pretty darned scary.

Can you tell I've discovered adding pictures to the blog? :)

I refuse to give up on my dream of writing. It's in my bones. But my need for a job is eclipsing those dreams at the moment. Do I keep up my web presence as a writer? Just say "screw you- this is who I am"? Or take it down and stifle my creativity in lieu of a regular income?

Decisions, decisions... and oh yeah, more stress!!

Take care,
-Amy